Stuff to do
by Pipeline
Summary: Hiro calls to see why Shuichi hasn't turned up for work, and our dear vocalist claims to be busy... This leads to nightmares, misunderstandings and...obsession? Slash. Warning: bad humor.
1. Stuff to do

**Rating:** PG-15/R  
**Pairing:** (obvious pairing) Shuichi/Yuki (imagined pairing) Hiro/Shuichi  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, all these characters belong to Murakami Maki, but the plot (if you can even call it that) is mine.  
**A/N:** Look-it! I finally freshened it up a bit! Yaaay! As you remember, this story was something that I wrote merely for the fun of it on a boring, rainy day, and even though I had every intention of updating it I obviously forgot to do so. I will make that up to you now! I will write a second chapter and maybe plan a few more ASAP! (_ambition level rising_)

Also, for those of you who don't appreciate bad humor and find this story to be under that category... Well, too bad for you. (_ha ha_) Because this pipeline has _the worst_ sense of humor, mua ha ha ha ha!

* * *

**Stuff to do**

(_on the phone_)

- Hiro? I'm sorry, but I won't be able to make it to the studio today... I'm kind of caught up in something... (_stifled cry_)

- Huh? Why not?

- Well, I... _ah_, I have stuff to do and take care of and... I'm sorry, I just won't make it. Sorry.

- But Shuichi! We're going to record our new single today! You _have_ to come!

- I can't... I, uh... _aaaahh_... shit!

- What are you doing?

- I,_ ahh_, bumped into a counter.

- A counter?

- I'm in the kitchen. _Ah_, shit... not there, _haaahh..._

- Shuichi? You're not making any sense. Should I come pick you up?

- No, I'm fine, I, _haaaahh_... another counter, sorry... _oh shit!_...

- Shuichi, are you sure you're all right?

- Yeah, I'm just fi--- (click)

- Shuichi? (_no reply_) Shuichi? (_angry outcry_) He hung up on me!

* * *

Hiro takes his motorcycle and drives over to Shuichi's place as fast as he can, convinced that something terrible is happening to his friend right in this instant. When he knocks on the door, there is no answer, and so he fears the worst has come to pass. Afraid that Shuichi might be acutely injured, or maybe even dying, he forces the door and rushes straight in to---

- _Aah! Aah! Aaaaaahhh!_

- (_blink, blink_) Shuichi!

The two naked men scramble apart. Shuichi vainly tries to hide behind the sofa, but Yuki merely leans back with a sly and self-righteous smirk on his thin lips, aware that he's well equipped.

- (_glare_) Uuuuhh...

- Hiro! This is not what you think!

- No? Looks to me as if you're screwing, all right.

- Yeah, we are - no, we were - but it's not what you think! I wasn't intending to ditch work to stay home with Yuki all day, he coerced me, and---

- Save it, okay? Man, I'm never going to get this picture out of my head.

- In that case you won't mind if we continue, would you? Shuichi, come back here... I wasn't finished with you.

- Yuck!

Hiro turns and leaves. Boy, will he have nightmares tonight...


	2. Kakurenbou The Game of HideAndSeek

**Kakurenbou– The Game of Hide-And-Seek**

When Hiro goes to sleep that night he is trembling with fear. _What if I dream about what I saw?_ It is definitely the last thing he wants to do, and so he decides to stay awake all night. If he can just managed to get through the first night the threat will be gone.

But staying awake is more difficult than he could have ever imagined. After only an hour his eyelids are beginning to fall shut as if someone has put a weight on them.

It seems impossible to evade sleep, but Hiro tries, oh how he tries...

* * *

- Hiroooo... oh, Hirooo...

He recognizes the voice immediately, but he does not want to believe that it's true. Shuichi – _here_?

He swirls around, trying to make out where the voice is coming from.

- Hirooo... come play hide and seek with me...

_Oh, I do NOT like this – at all!_

Something tells him that go looking for Shuichi is the worst thing he can do at the moment, but his legs starts to move anyway. He can't control his own body.

- No! (_desperately trying to break free of the spell_)

- Hiro, where _are_ you? What's taking you so long?

- No, I don't want to do this! I don't want to play this game!

Suddenly someone grabs his shoulder from behind and forces him to turn around.

- Oh, I think you will just have to, dear. (_scary, erotic smile_)

It is Shuichi – and he is completely, stark naked! But that's not all...

Shuichi makes a suggestive move towards Hiro.

- Oops, look like I found you... Well, then I guess we'll just have to move on to the second stage of this game... _tut-tut-tut_...

- No! (_shaking feverishly_) I don't want to! I'm going home now, I'm going—

- No, you're not, you're staying here with me 'cos I need someone to warm me. See, I'm freezing. (_indicates goosebumps_)

- Nooooo! (_looks away_) Stop that! We're friends! _Friends!_ You can't do this, think of the band! Think of Fujisaki! What will Fujisaki say if you seduce me?

- He he he... (_twirling a strand of Hiro's hair around his finger_) He'd be _sooo_ proud of me for finally bedding you, Hiro-tan. Now come to bed with me.

A bed appears out of thin air. Hiro stares at it with dread.

- Can't we just agree on being friends? (_pitiful peep_)

- Nope. I want your ass. (_grabbing_)

- _Nooooo!_ Yuki! Think of Yuki! Yuki-san will ha-ha-hate you for doing this! Yes, he'll give you a hard time, he'll lock you out of the house again, he'll even take back his key!

Shuichi frowns in lack of understanding.

- Who's Yuki?

- _NnnnOOOOOOOOOOoooo!_

* * *

**A/N:** Arga tomtar! Hahahaha... Sorry, that was an inside joke between a friend of mine and me... hrm. Yaaay! I finally updated it! I am so, so happy that you all encouraged me into updating right now! All of you who read and reviewed _Stuff to do_ - thank you so much! This chapter is written entirely for you (and I love it, I love it, I love it!). It actually turned out better than I anticipated. I am _definitely_ continuing on this story! From now on I will strain my mind to come up with more funny situations between Hiro and Shuichi - real _and_ imagined. :) So keep reading and keep reviewing, every opinion is warmly welcomed. 

By the way... "Arga tomtar" is Swedish and it means "Angry Santas", if any of you were wondering... (_ha ha ha ha ha_)


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